Religion is a very tough topic to discuss…I am part of a family which belongs to “Sagrado Katoliko” as we call it in Filipino. Both my parents are Catholic, we were taught to go to church at least once a week to pledge our devotion, pray the rosary everyday, in the morning when you wake up and before going to bed.
For a time during my childhood, while kids like me wanted to be a Doctor or a Nurse, I dreamt of being a Nun. But as I was growing up, this dream sort of faded or forgotten. I don’t know why. Probably because I started to like things that pulled me away from this dream. I attended mass less often than I should and stopped praying the rosary (never memorized the mysteries anyway). But there is one thing that I never stopped doing, that’s Praying. I may miss a Sunday Mass, but will not forget to Pray as often as I can.
I believe in the power of prayers. And to me this is the only time that I feel relaxed. This is the only time that I can pour my heart out without pretensions, without worrying that I will be judged on whatever I say or think and receive a harsh reply. If others find Yoga relaxing and give them peace of mind, to me it’s Praying.
I remember when I was in college, I would go to Monasterio de Sta. Clara (St. Claire) in Quezon city not to attend the Mass but to pray. Not to ask of anything but just to talk to Him of what’s going on with my life (as if He doesn’t know). It’s my favorite sanctuary to pray and talk to God. I like the mood Sta Clara church gives. Especially, during regular days where only few people are inside the church and there is no mass being held. So solemn and sacred. You can hear the choir sing…and since it is also a convent, it’s an all female choir. Their voices are so angelic it never fails to give me shivers and leave the place teary eyed.
Last Sunday, when we attended the mass. The Priest was talking about the power of prayers. He asked, ” Why do catholics do their prayers in repetitions?” or “paulit-ulit” (in Filipino). He answered his question by saying, “It’s not because God doesn’t hear us, but because God wants our prayer to be etched on our hearts that we (the person who is praying) would convince ourselves of our prayer. That to enable our prayer to be answered, we should convince ourselves that this is what we want. That it is our hearts desire. The reason why there are unanswered prayers is because, the person who is praying is not wholeheartedly into his prayer. He prays for something that his heart is irresolute or indecisive of.” I agree with him. I’m guilty of this. When I pray I always say, ” Lord, bahala ka na. I don’t know what to do. Your will be done.” I end up still lost. Or I pray for something but on the back of my mind I say ” Is this the right thing to ask? or will I be able to face the outcome of my prayer?” Nothing happens. But when I pray hard for something so definite and specific, I always get an answered prayer. I guess He wants us to be sure of what we are asking for. That we are ready for the responsibility of whatever we asked for.
In every decision I make in my life, I always seek His guidance. I pray hard for God to give me a sign that this, or that is the right road to take. I may have made a few that I regret taking probably because I didn’t hear Him right, but I don’t regret taking them. Because it made me what I am today and though He knows that I didn’t choose the road I was supposed to take, He never left my side and walked me through.
As I take this journey of being a parent, I felt the responsibility of teaching my kids how to pray. I’m glad that they are enrolled in a school where they give importance to molding my kids faith in God and teaching values that other schools set aside. At the same time, they awaken my faith.
Now that my kids are growing up so fast, my husband and I are making sure that we go to church every Sunday. To teach my kids the value of our religion, of praying and talking to God. The same thing that our parents have taught us. And hopefully the same thing that my kids will teach their children.
We may have different religions and beliefs but one thing is common to us, we all Pray. And through prayer we are united as children of God. Keep on praying for God is good all the time…